Letting men be men

Ah, dating. So exciting and fun. Meeting someone new, getting those goosebumps, anxiously awaiting to hear from them. Good times.

Before I proceed, let me state that I am totally aware that other than blatant dating no-no's, everyone has different expectations of what they want. There is no right or wrong. And these views I express are mine and mine alone.

I started to think about my own experiences dating. I've always thought that I am stuck in the middle of both new and old dating mentalities, with the line separating them being very blurry.

Let me start off by saying that I absolutely, totally, and completely, want to meet and be with a man that will spoil me.

Before you go ahead and think that I am some spoiled, materialistic person, let me end that statement with this: because I want to absolutely, totally, and completely spoil him too.

:: enter blurry line here ::

Do I like when men pay for stuff? Absolutely. Who doesn't? [And if you don't you need to go that way because you are ruining things for us that do].

Do I NEED men to pay for stuff? No. This is when I stand on my soap box and proclaim my "I am woman, hear me roar, I got a job, I went to school, and I don't need nobody to help me handle my business" speech.

But...I am still a woman. And I want a man that treats me as such because I will treat them like a man. Because in my head, those roles do still exist. No my husband is most probably not going to come home to me everyday in the kitchen and pulling out the fresh pie while I'm in an apron and 10 kids run around me. But will I take care of him? Totally. A woman takes care of her man and a man takes cares of his woman.

As it should be. Or maybe that's just how I see it. Growing up I saw my parents in stereotypical roles with a twist. My mother has always been the one to clean and do laundry. My dads version of cleaning is to pass a vacuum and God forbid he understood different water settings and using separate machines. On the other hand, my mother hates to cook. She did it because she had to feed us, but she hates it. Enter my father who one day decided he was the next Emeril, and now you see him always in the kitchen most days of the week. Not only does he offer, but he loves it. My mom has always worked and had her own, separate bank account. But they've always had a joint account for the house affairs and my dad has always "taken care of" things. Because well, he's the man.

Now let's get back to me. I work, I drive, and [according to Jenn] I have He-Man strength. But I have always appreciated when men...are men. Yes I expect  you to be bigger and stronger than me. Yes if I play fight with you, I will use all of my energy to try to beat you but I don't expect to win. Because you should physically be stronger than me. And if you're not, I'm going to look down on you [just sayin].

I love a man. A manly man. Well kept manly men, but men nonetheless. Too many men nowadays have just as many products in their bathrooms as I do. Which makes me feel some sort of way. I don't expect you to use Irish spring soap as your shampoo, facewash, and body soap, but loofah's, bath and body works, and nose strips are just too much. I'm sorry. It bugs me. Why do you smell like strawberries?

Maybe I'm alone in my thinking but somewhere along the way, men started acting more like women and vice versa and now everything is screwed up. Please hold the door for me. Not because I can't open it but just to be chivalrous. Please don't publicly be an emotional sap. I am totally aware that behind closed doors, the manliest of men will pull out that childish voice and beg for kisses. They'll pout, be uber affectionate, and call you baby for days. That's cute. Publicly? Please no. Don't be RUDE but, for lack of a better way to put it...do not act like a female in public. Don't say something like you don't want to go paintballing because it hurts. If I don't have a problem with it, you really shouldn't. And if you do get hurt, I'll take care of you! You can't lose.

Times have indeed changed though. Being a "man" no longer means you're a dictator who doesn't lift a finger at home, and being a "woman" is no longer related to being subordinate. I embrace that. But I think too many men and women have abandoned the rules way too much and that makes me sad. Yeah I am woman and I roar, but you should sure enough be roaring too.